ChrisE writes a novel.

Got a project? Want some help, ideas, advice, or just want to get the word out? This is your place.
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Postby ChrisE » 2012.08.23 (21:35)

Before I begin, I'm not asking for contribution.
I don't really expect anybody here to read at, or even give me feedback, but if you would I shall be most grateful.

If you're thinking that you won't have time, don't worry. I don't expect you to download and read immediately. Take your time. Immerse yourself in the tale. If it's not for you, fair enough, but don't just leave a comment saying it's shit; constructive criticism is appreciated.

The few friends that I've shown this work to have commented that my style is similar to that of Terry Pratchett or Douglas Adams, so if you don't like reading wit and whimsy with terrible word play, this probably won't be for you.

If you're still reading I'd like to remind you that all everything that appears in this document is mine and you may not plagiarise it and claim it as your own.

It's also a microsoft word document, so I hope you are able to read that.

If you are still unsure as to whether you want to give it a browse, here are some choice quotes:

ChrisE wrote:It was the bedroom that Death was most proud of. It was a shocking pink. It hurt to look at. It was the kind of pink you had to close your eyes, count to ten, and pray had gone before you opened them again. The idea that Death even had a bedroom was ridiculous. He didn’t need sleep, nor did he want it; though sometimes it was preferable to late-night television. Death remained hopeful that he’d meet a nice girl one day, and the thought of having to say

“Shall we go back to your place? I’ve got no bed see…”

Was far more embarrassing than telling the girl things may get a bit complicated should they ever progress past first base.


ChrisE wrote: A peahen that had been proudly strutting behind the car, shocked at the sudden noise, attempted to fly away, forgetting that it couldn’t. It took off, reached a height of about five feet before panicking, flailing its wings wildly, and returning to the ground with all the grace of a brick.


Current Word Count: 11,034 | 23rd August 2012

Here is a google document, just in case. Enjoy.

Four Horsemen.docx
(50.08 KiB) Downloaded 130 times
Last edited by ChrisE on 2012.08.25 (01:38), edited 1 time in total.
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Postby otters~1 » 2012.08.25 (01:13)

I'm probably going to read this at some point, like I promised, but I honestly don't expect to like it. I've read many attempts to channel Douglas Adams and written a few of them -- they almost always come off as a) not funny, and b) very clear mimicry of Douglas Adams. So we'll see.

Incidentally, this sentence

It took off, reached a height of about five feet before panicking, flailing its wings wildly and returning to the ground with all the grace of a brick.
is not grammatically correct so it wasn't perhaps the best choice for your sample sentence :p.
the dusk the dawn the earth the sea

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Postby ChrisE » 2012.08.25 (01:36)

centerƒire wrote:I'm probably going to read this at some point, like I promised, but I honestly don't expect to like it. I've read many attempts to channel Douglas Adams and written a few of them -- they almost always come off as a) not funny, and b) very clear mimicry of Douglas Adams. So we'll see.

Incidentally, this sentence

It took off, reached a height of about five feet before panicking, flailing its wings wildly and returning to the ground with all the grace of a brick.
is not grammatically correct so it wasn't perhaps the best choice for your sample sentence :p.


Well fuck me I'm missing a comma.
I'm not attempting to channel Douglas Adams, I've never actually read any of his works.

I wouldn't blame you if you feel that way though. I can't force you to like it!
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Postby _Pai_Mei_ » 2012.08.25 (12:14)

Really good idea, particulary enjoyed the university where time failed, hope that will be expanded on later in the story. Looking forward to the next installment!

bwt: I've read a lot of disc world novels (the earlier ones being my favourites) and the "long dark teatime of the soul" is a great read.

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Postby otters~1 » 2012.08.25 (20:19)

WHAT?!

You are British! For shame!
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Postby ChrisE » 2012.08.26 (16:16)

centerƒire wrote:WHAT?!

You are British! For shame!


Yeah...
I should probably look into them.

TO THE LIBRARY!
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