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The Dark room...the very dark room. Everything you find kills you. Here's how it works, (I'll just use a couple of examples) Remember, it's a dark room. NOBODY CAN LIVE AFTER FINDING SOMETHING!!!!!

Person1: I found an apple

Person2: You choked on the apple
I found a T.V.
Person3: You didn't see how big the T.V. was, it falls and crushes you
I found some Ice Cream.

and so on


I'll start it with this

I found a glass of water

i think this might've been done before.

the glass of water pulls a gun on you.

i found a computer.

it swallows you whole.

i found BE_nSPIRED's shoe.

You tripped on it and you were kicked to death by your shoe
I found a small 3x2x4 foot cardboard box

you spend days trying to figure out which side is up and then forget to eat and die.

then i find the ion cannon and blow you up.

i find your smoldering ashes.

i jump out from behind it and asplode you with my ion cannon.

i find a capslock key.

I see what you did there


I find safety, happiness, and light (but not enough to blind me)

( You didn't kill him! I guess I'll do it for you )

I suffocate be_nspired with the box.
I take his ion cannon and smack sithmaster dead.

I find a video camera.

The infernal ringing annoys Turiski who blasts you with the ion cannon.

I find a shield.

The shield explodes in your face. Why? Because I said so.

I don't find anything.

You starve.

I wish for a bicycle.

Bicycles are dangerous. You run in to a telephone pole and die.

Look, a file folder.

You don't realize that the file folder is made of glue, so when you pick it up, your hands stick to it and you can't eat, so you starve to death.

Hey look, an ice cube!

jean-luc wrote:Bicycles are dangerous. You run in to a telephone pole and die.

Wait... I saw a bicycle, and died by running into a telephone pole?


Sounds like me, I can hardly ride the things.


Anyway, the cube melts and you drown (you didn't specify how big. Woot, extreme Pedantic-ness (if that's even a word)).

Wait... Is that an Xbox 360 I see there?

There's a reason they call it the Red Ring of DEATH o_O

You find a bath filled with water.

you drop your wedding ring in and then jump in to save it. a monster swallows you and its intestinal fluids dissolve your flesh.

i found GTM's wedding ring!

I come in and beat the snot out of you with it.
I found eganic's snot.

you choke on it.

freak.

i find a house.

a big house.

A house of the Dead (and no, it's not the arcade game).

What happens next is kinda obvious.


I can't see anything, it's too dark.

I find a torch and a knuckleduster, and kill you with them. The torch breaks, but I still have the knuckleduster.

And GTM's wedding ring? Ew...

You found it? We all embarass you with hardly relevant stuff and you commit suicide.
I found a PSP!!! But I already have one so I put it back.

One anagram humiliates you like my 'Car Anus' thing.
I laughed at it, though.
I find an Evoker.

...Let me guess, nobody knows what an Evoker is.

Thought so. Fine, I find a pair of fake boobs.

Boobs squeeze your neck and you die.

I found something{something} that can hurt nothing.

you trip on a body, you die

i find a source of light that is currently on