Stalking 101: How to not talk to girls

[SlappyMcGee]

Having the mentality of a middle-schooler according to everybody I know has been vindicated by the fact that my jaw was to the floor when I read Rhekatou's post.

But I also see this as ridiculous teenage bullshit. Older but wiser.

[Rhekatou]

Having the mentality of a middle-schooler according to everybody I know has been vindicated by the fact that my jaw was to the floor when I read Rhekatou's post.

Wuzzat supposed to mean?


Damn the smart-ass who tells me to look up the definition of vindicated. That's not what I'm asking.

[SlappyMcGee]

Just that I feel you, bro, whether or not this is a middle school problem.

[Kaylab]

I sit here on a forum, in which I have no idea what im doing, and I just read random stuff.

[origami_alligator]

I sit here on a forum, in which I have no idea what im doing, and I just read random stuff.

I'm so glad your life is so horrible. :/

[otters]

Either I'm genuinely suffering IRC withdrawal or I accidentally ate something foul for breakfast.

[Rhekatou]

Either I'm genuinely suffering IRC withdrawal or I accidentally ate something foul for breakfast.

I accidentally ate something fowl for lunch.

[t̷s͢uk̕a͡t͜ư]

I intentionally ate something fowl for lunch. It was kind of foul.

[Rhekatou]

I intentionally ate something fowl for lunch. It was kind of foul.

Joke copier.

[aids]

I intentionally ate something fowl for lunch. It was kind of foul.

Joke copier.

Quote copier.

[Rhekatou]

I intentionally ate something fowl for lunch. It was kind of foul.

Joke copier.

Quote copier.

Hypocrite.

[SlappyMcGee]

These kind of posts aren't allowed and you are so dangerously close to a permaban.

[rocket_thumped]

I died a little inside last night. The more I grow up, the more I realize my expectations of life were wrong. Growing up is disheartening.

[aids]

Oops, sorry Slappy.

Yeah, so I was going to ask a girl I like from school to the school dance tomorrow but I pussied out. I talked to her on Facebook for the first time ever last night, so it would be a bad idea to ask her over Facebook, right?

*EDIT* Ha, you totally quoted me posting in the wrong thread. That's funny.

[SlappyMcGee]

Oops, sorry Slappy.

So, who exactly is blue_tetris?

You aren't dangerously close to a permaban, love.

[Rhekatou]

Yeah, so I was going to ask a girl I like from school to the school dance tomorrow but I pussied out. I talked to her on Facebook for the first time ever last night, so it would be a bad idea to ask her over Facebook, right?

Rule of thumb is that when asking a girl to a dance/out/whatever, it is preferable to do things face-to-face. I would strongly advise against using facebook chat. That's about as impersonal as it gets.

And it's impossible to tell if they're teasing you and don't really mean it...

Call her, at least. Not facebook.

[aids]

I don't really care anymore about social norms, so I wrote a frickin' long message to her explaining how I felt and other stuff. I hope that she's mature enough not to tease me, and responds back.

[Pheidippides]

I don't really care anymore about social norms, so I wrote a frickin' long message to her explaining how I felt and other stuff. I hope that she's mature enough not to tease me, and responds back.

Dude, just man up and tell her to her face. Let me tell you, even if you don't get the answer you want (or if you don't get one at all - this happened/is happening to me), you will feel /so/ much better for it. It's also a good way to determine just how strongly you feel about the whole thing. My veins felt like my heart was pumping fire...

But yeah, if you need to (and I did), script it out first and practice in front of a mirror. But please, for the love of love, say it to her face. There really is no other way, barring extenuating circumstances.

[aids]

I don't really care anymore about social norms, so I wrote a frickin' long message to her explaining how I felt and other stuff. I hope that she's mature enough not to tease me, and responds back.

Dude, just man up and tell her to her face. Let me tell you, even if you don't get the answer you want (or if you don't get one at all - this happened/is happening to me), you will feel /so/ much better for it. It's also a good way to determine just how strongly you feel about the whole thing. My veins felt like my heart was pumping fire...

But yeah, if you need to (and I did), script it out first and practice in front of a mirror. But please, for the love of love, say it to her face. There really is no other way, barring extenuating circumstances.

Yes, I know, but I already told her in a Facebook message, and I won't see her again until school on Monday. So should I tell her in person on Monday again? Like, everything I need to say was said, but I should still physically talk to her and repeat it, right?

[Pheidippides]

Yes, I know, but I already told her in a Facebook message, and I won't see her again until school on Monday. So should I tell her in person on Monday again? Like, everything I need to say was said, but I should still physically talk to her and repeat it, right?

You don't need to repeat it word-for-word, obviously, but if you end up talking to her about it, I'd reaffirm the key points of whatever it is you wrote - "I meant it," and the like. Because if you can't confess in person, it's like you don't mean it. And if it's like you don't mean it, she has every liberty to treat it like you really didn't mean it. And you do mean it, dontcha? ;)

If she doesn't approach you about it right away, don't force a conversation. These things take time to digest. If she's mature enough, she'll either know or find out how best to respond to you, in due time. If, however, she does try to act like it never happened, you'll have to try something else. Like talking in person.

As for talking in person, don't worry about not being ready. Even if you think you are ready, you're not ready. It's okay. Fear is powerful, and indeed the mind-killer, but in the end, it can only delay those things which our hearts make inevitable.

Boy, I've really gone and waxed romantic tonight, haven't I?

[aids]

Yes, I know, but I already told her in a Facebook message, and I won't see her again until school on Monday. So should I tell her in person on Monday again? Like, everything I need to say was said, but I should still physically talk to her and repeat it, right?

You don't need to repeat it word-for-word, obviously, but if you end up talking to her about it, I'd reaffirm the key points of whatever it is you wrote - "I meant it," and the like. Because if you can't confess in person, it's like you don't mean it. And if it's like you don't mean it, she has every liberty to treat it like you really didn't mean it. And you do mean it, dontcha? ;)

If she doesn't approach you about it right away, don't force a conversation. These things take time to digest. If she's mature enough, she'll either know or find out how best to respond to you, in due time. If, however, she does try to act like it never happened, you'll have to try something else. Like talking in person.

As for talking in person, don't worry about not being ready. Even if you think you are ready, you're not ready. It's okay. Fear is powerful, and indeed the mind-killer, but in the end, it can only delay those things which our hearts make inevitable.

Boy, I've really gone and waxed romantic tonight, haven't I?

If this works out I think I'll buy you a puppy or something.

[Amadeus]

Yes, I know, but I already told her in a Facebook message, and I won't see her again until school on Monday. So should I tell her in person on Monday again? Like, everything I need to say was said, but I should still physically talk to her and repeat it, right?

You don't need to repeat it word-for-word, obviously, but if you end up talking to her about it, I'd reaffirm the key points of whatever it is you wrote - "I meant it," and the like. Because if you can't confess in person, it's like you don't mean it. And if it's like you don't mean it, she has every liberty to treat it like you really didn't mean it. And you do mean it, dontcha? ;)

If she doesn't approach you about it right away, don't force a conversation. These things take time to digest. If she's mature enough, she'll either know or find out how best to respond to you, in due time. If, however, she does try to act like it never happened, you'll have to try something else. Like talking in person.

As for talking in person, don't worry about not being ready. Even if you think you are ready, you're not ready. It's okay. Fear is powerful, and indeed the mind-killer, but in the end, it can only delay those things which our hearts make inevitable.

Boy, I've really gone and waxed romantic tonight, haven't I?

oh, Dune.

[Pheidippides]

oh, Dune.

Never actually read it, but yes, I borrowed the "mind-killer" bit. Actually, it was this community (specifically LouDog) that first exposed me to the quote. The rest of that sentence and post is me, though. I must be getting either too comfortable around here or too crazy to care. ;)

And what breed of puppy? :)

[Destiny]

Ahaha, that puppy thing really made me laugh ^^

Best of luck, I hope everything goes smoothly!

[aids]

So, last night (Sunday), my father and I go to see The Lovely Bones, which apart from the main actress' eyes, sucked. Nearing the end of the movie, my phone received a Facebook message from the one and only. I had to wait until I got home to read it, since my phone can only handle like 50 characters at a time. I had to wait about an hour until I finally got home. I'm sure some of you *cough*squibbles*cough* saw me freak out on IRC when I read her letter, and with a "Fuck my life" I left for the night. In her response she said that she was overwhelmed, since the letter I wrote was over a thousand words, which is crazy coming from a guy who hadn't said more than ten in the past three years.

She said it too courage to tell her my feelings, but (I think) it was closer to cowardice since I didn't do it face-to-face (you're getting a Pekingese, Pheidi). She said I was foolish to fall for someone without getting to know them first. That I wouldn't like her as much if I really knew her. I don't know if sending her the letter was a good thing or a bad thing now. She played the "nice guy" card and the "good friend" card, unsurprisingly. I don't really blame her; I came on stronger than a bitch in heat. *slaps forehead* What was I thinking? But then she drops the nuke: "i also am currently dating someone else."

Uhhhhhhhhh...shit. I keep thinking that this whole time she was leading me on, but I guess she felt differently. I'm trying not to hate her, and I'm trying not to hate myself, but it's hard. Everything I dreamed of during the past three years is vanished, unless her current relationship doesn't work out (and I'm trying damn hard not to wish ill upon it). I replied back, asking if we could talk, so I could figure out what the hell happened, but my friend told me that, as a girl, she'd think it would end up being awkward. But I need answers. I told her I would talk to her today at school, but still couldn't work up the nards to do it.

I don't know what to do...