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Yesterday I bumped my knee kinda hard this one time. It didn't leave a bruise or anything, but it stung pretty bad.
I've never broken a bone in my life, and I clot almost immediately. My blood is like a milkshake. I eat iron filings, and I shit beat-up '76 Buicks.

Tsukatu wrote:Yesterday I bumped my knee kinda hard this one time. It didn't leave a bruise or anything, but it stung pretty bad.
I've never broken a bone in my life, and I clot almost immediately. My blood is like a milkshake. I eat iron filings, and I shit beat-up '76 Buicks.

Same exact thing for me. But I always get my toes slammed on couches and doors

Playing Sonic 06 with a cynical friend. AARGH IT BURNS.

MattKestrel wrote:Playing Sonic 06 with a cynical friend. AARGH IT BURNS.

The... L-loading screens... The voice a-a-acting... The beastiality...

THE HORROR!

Tsukatu wrote:Yesterday I bumped my knee kinda hard this one time. It didn't leave a bruise or anything, but it stung pretty bad.
I've never broken a bone in my life, and I clot almost immediately. My blood is like a milkshake. I eat iron filings, and I shit beat-up '76 Buicks.

Ym-hmm.

I stepped on a broken beer-bottle once. Got a fuckload of stitches. Was on a cane for a month. That's aboot it.

Ampersand wrote:I stepped on a broken beer-bottle once. That's aboot it.

Ba-dum-tish.

MattKestrel wrote:

Ampersand wrote:I stepped on a broken beer-bottle once. That's aboot it.

Ba-dum-tish.

The guy who left the bottle there must have been quite a heel.

Hey, at least I didn't say there was trouble afoot.

Once, when I was younger, I had the trunk of a car slammed on my head. No, literally, slammed on it. Had to get some stitches in my head.

Another time, I fell off a 5 foot or so high bunk bead, and hit my head on the hard linoleum floor. More stitches ensued.

Ampersand: At least you weren't fully defeeted.

Hmm....

What Tsukatu said. Probably was when I was swinging my sword around and managed to find the side of my foot and cut it open a couple inches.

Cheez wrote:Hmm....

What Tsukatu said. Probably was when I was swinging my sword around and managed to find the side of my foot and cut it open a couple inches.

O.O >_> <<O.O>> "A couple inches"?...

When playing football, instead of hitting the ball, I hit the other player foot, that was going down at full speed, like mine's. No foot in 2-3-4-5 days.

Cheez wrote:What Tsukatu said. Probably was when I was swinging my sword around and managed to find the side of my foot and cut it open a couple inches.

Oh shit. Forget Ampersand, this is real foot-trouble.

Being all serious now, I've never really been hurt that badly. Two incidents which spring to mind are...

1) A random stranger off the street punching me in the stomach and running away. Wtf?! I guess I'm that likeable -_-

2) Playing interhouse hockey at school, someone else rammed their hockey stick into my hand at 20 mph. Well, at least this time it wasn't intentional. The really bad news was, he hit my left hand, so I could still write perfectly and couldn't be sent home. Bummer.

uMM. i was hiking in new hampshire and i slipped on a mossy rock and fell on my wrist. i cried the whole way home.

The most painful thing I have experienced in recent memory is the 60+ chigger bites currently on my legs. The completely ridiculous itch is waining, but I could hardly sleep the first night I had 'em.
Other then that, I have been stung on the tongue by a bee, but it wasn't really painful, just... weird :/

smartalco wrote:The most painful thing I have experienced in recent memory is the 60+ chigger bites currently on my legs. The completely ridiculous itch is waining, but I could hardly sleep the first night I had 'em.
Other then that, I have been stung on the tongue by a bee, but it wasn't really painful, just... weird :/

Haha, I've never been stung by a bee actually. I have a big fear of them.

And wasps.

And yellowjackets.

I also hate chiggers. We were walking down to the river at my grandad's, and we went through a bit of woods, and they managed to find us...bleh..

It's also funny because I didn't know I had cut my foot open until I felt my foot getting kinda warm, so I looked down and saw blood seeping from the wound. :D

Cheez wrote:Hmm....

What Tsukatu said. Probably was when I was swinging my sword around and managed to find the side of my foot and cut it open a couple inches.

Is that a euphemism? o.0
Anyway, probably when I suffered various injuries after a bad fall on a Duke of Edinburgh expedition.

cheesemonger wrote:

Cheez wrote:Hmm....

What Tsukatu said. Probably was when I was swinging my sword around and managed to find the side of my foot and cut it open a couple inches.

Is that a euphemism? o.0
Anyway, probably when I suffered various injuries after a bad fall on a Duke of Edinburgh expedition.

...a wot?

I sprained my ankle once and almost broke it. Actually, that was a good feeling. But it was the most pain I've ever been in, I suppose. I'm not that afraid of bees anymore, but when I was younger, I was deathly afraid of them. So I still have seizures when I see or hear them. I've never broken bones or cut myself though.

yungerkid wrote:I sprained my ankle once and almost broke it. Actually, that was a good feeling. But it was the most pain I've ever been in, I suppose. I'm not that afraid of bees anymore, but when I was younger, I was deathly afraid of them. So I still have seizures when I see or hear them. I've never broken bones or cut myself though.

You've never cut yourself?
I assume you're saying you've never cut yourself severely. Either that or you're very talented.

MattKestrel wrote:1) A random stranger off the street punching me in the stomach and running away. Wtf?! I guess I'm that likeable -_-

I'm sorry, but I couldn't help laughing here. I'm such a good friend...

I post again after I'm in agony having had Matt here shoot me point blank with a paintball gun. Even if they're not that bad...

Cheez wrote:

cheesemonger wrote:

Cheez wrote:Hmm....

What Tsukatu said. Probably was when I was swinging my sword around and managed to find the side of my foot and cut it open a couple inches.

Is that a euphemism? o.0
Anyway, probably when I suffered various injuries after a bad fall on a Duke of Edinburgh expedition.

...a wot?

If I say Vagina is another word for a scabbard, then you can probably work out what he's talking about.

Drathmoore wrote:If I say Vagina is another word for a scabbard, then you can probably work out what he's talking about.

Oh. ._.

cheesemonger wrote:Is that a euphemism? o.0

Uh, eaphamisms are supposed to make things sound good. Like saying McDoanlds is a diner, when it's just a fastfood joint, generally used to entice someone ito something.

Also, I've had to get braces once. Anyway, my mom was reading a book to me and my sister, and suddenly this infected part of my mouth starts hurting. I literaly burst out into tears right there on the spot. =/

I ran into a metal picnic table running full speed. And my knee exploded.

I used to hang out with an amateur carpenter in high school. He basically designed the entire upstairs of his house so, subsequently, there were nails everywhere. We were always cautious not to step on any, but at times, someone would, and a quick shot and rush to the hospital would be all that was required. One day, we decided that we'd had enough, so we cleaned up all of the nails and stuck them in a plastic bag. Wouldn't you know, a dude burst in the door just an hour after finishing this and stepped on the entire bag. Seven nails straight through his foot, worst pain I ever witnessed. Probably the worst I've ever been in was in Startropics when you get trapped in that whale's stomach with a bomb or whatever, and you need to put 747 ( a number since etched into memory) into the game, but you need to get that from the instruction manual, which I got from the rental store, but was missing the letter you needed to dip in water. Wtf.

ToeFaceKiller wrote:I ran into a metal picnic table running full speed. And my knee exploded.

Ouch.
I though of:

ToeFaceKiller wrote:I ran into a trapdoor running full speed. And my ninja exploded.

:p

Also, Slaps, that sounded really painful. You shoulda said something like: "and seven nails went straight through his food, blood splattering on the floor.."
You know. Do as Skyline said and provide graphic, dramatic details. :/