Granted, but it's a 800 pound tuna with mercury poisoning that you serve to all of your friends and family. However, there is not enough for you, so you die alone.
I wish more people would sign up for my competition.
Corrupt a Wish
-
- The Dreamster Teamster
- Posts: 83
- Joined: 2008.10.02 (10:17)
- NUMA Profile: http://nmaps.net/user/_underscore_
Credit to GTM for my amazing sig.
-
- The 700 Club
- Posts: 743
- Joined: 2008.09.30 (07:37)
- NUMA Profile: http://nmaps.net/user/jackass77
- MBTI Type: ESFJ
- Location: Australia
Granted but then your competition all goes wrong and everyone get really dissapointed with you and hates you
I wish I had a working mac that nothing could go wrong with it and it had all the programs and they all worked and it was a real mac and everything eles that could go wrong couldnt
I wish I had a working mac that nothing could go wrong with it and it had all the programs and they all worked and it was a real mac and everything eles that could go wrong couldnt
[align=center]
Mine :: Techno :: Incluye :: GTM ::Skyline :: Riobe :: GTM 2[/align]
Mine :: Techno :: Incluye :: GTM ::Skyline :: Riobe :: GTM 2[/align]
-
- The Dreamster Teamster
- Posts: 83
- Joined: 2008.10.02 (10:17)
- NUMA Profile: http://nmaps.net/user/_underscore_
Granted, but you still own a mac, so you suck.
I wish for world peace.
I wish for world peace.
Credit to GTM for my amazing sig.
-
- Plus (Size) Member
- Posts: 43
- Joined: 2008.09.27 (18:37)
- NUMA Profile: http://nmaps.net/user/nan__d_chaser
- Location: Zagreb, Croatia
Granted, but people get bored and start wars again
I wish for 0% foreclosure
I wish for 0% foreclosure
Click to get a suprise...
RCE these = RCE yours. Remember to actually rate!
[/spoiler]-
- Ice Cold
- Posts: 202
- Joined: 2008.11.13 (01:18)
- NUMA Profile: http://nmaps.net/user/sithmaster
- Location: East Dakota aka the West Coast of Mongolia
- Contact:
granted, but you get an afterclosure (I don't know means)
I wish for the power to be a master of both the Spanish and English languages
I wish for the power to be a master of both the Spanish and English languages
quotes of the old forum
Blue_Tetris: Wait, wait wait. Does this mean I can break the rules to provoke a reaction and not get banned?
...awesome! The next few days are gonna be some fun.
Someguy: Eagles may soar in the sky, but weasels never get sucked right into a jet engine
Steven Colbert: I see patterns where they don't where they don't exist!!!
Mosh: Fishing for fish only works if the fish are hungry. Don't ask the fish why they don't bite. Rather, consider why they aren't biting.
Or simply chuck a grenade in the lake, pick up the dead fish, and call it a day.
capt_weasle: Mare is actually reagan who is really Tsukatu, who is actually just God. And you can't say he isn't because that would mean he doesnt believe in himself. He just has a low self esteem. Poor guy.
Palemoon:thanks, maestro. Now i can stop smearing paste on my face with a broom
Animator:Eat those poor gingerbread men? For shame. Do you know how many widows are in a gingerbread family? Millions. They have been fighting a war with humanity ever since they were made just to survive and live, with no luck! Think of the children, man! Those poor gingerbread children who are orpahns now, because their moms and dads were eaten, AND THEY WILL SHARE THE SAME FATE TOO! It's saddening. Please, go out there and raise money to save this ever-endangered reality of sugar and bread. Please, for the sake of this kind... think of the oven.
Player 1:You may very well be the first person on the planet to have his faced caved in by a fistful of turkey. Congratulations.
Click here to feed me a Rare Candy!
Get your own at Pokeplushies!
Tsukatu Twilight Rant
BELLA parks her car and enters the school.
EDWARD: "Hello, Bella. I am very awkward, and I am a vampire."
Freeze frame: the text "protagonist, and also a vampire" appears, and an arrow pointing from the text to EDWARD blinks a few times.
BELLA: "I am infatuated with you." (she turns to the camera) "I am unaware that Edward is a vampire."
EDWARD: "I am infatuated with you, too, and I am a vampire."
BELLA: "Let's be awkward together." (she turns to the camera) "I am still unaware that Edward is a vampire."
EDWARD: "I completely agree, and I am very clearly a vampire."
(EDWARD does vampirey things.)
BELLA: "Thank you for saving my life."
EDWARD: "No problem, and I am a vampire."
BELLA: (to the camera) "I am beginning to suspect that Edward is not human."
EDWARD: "I am a vampire."
BELLA: "Are you a superhero?"
EDWARD: "No, I am a vampire."
BELLA: "What are you then?"
EDWARD: "I am not the good guy; I am the bad guy." (he turns to the camera) "That was a lie. I am very much the good guy." (he turns back to Bella) "Specifically, I am a vampire."
BELLA: (to the camera) "I am beginning to suspect that Edward is a vampire."
JACOB: "Hello, Bella, and I am very clearly a werewolf. Look at my wacky canines."
BELLA: "What do you have against Edward, anyway?"
JACOB: "I am a werewolf."
BELLA: "I am convinced that you are a normal human being."
JACOB: "Everyone in my tribe is a werewolf. I am in my tribe; I am also a werewolf. We are all werewolves."
BELLA: "I have no reason to believe that you are more than human."
And what exactly is Bella's problem? Why does she fall head-over-heels with an anti-social, almost preternaturally awkward, whiny, mascara-wearing emo cunt?
lord_day
I guess the guy who wrote XKCD was right. You can't be too stupid for youtube.
brocerius
When i say 'Abortion is murder' i mean just that; it is the taking of life - in that, from conception, a fetus is as definably life as is a bacteria, a puppy, or Stephen Hawking. This is how i think it differs from contraception, masturbation, and not screwing Dave.
Blue_Tetris quotes (all taken from a topic on abortion)
Eating vegetables instead of meat lowers your sperm count, clearly killing potential children. Vegetarians are murderers.
If a chair comes into my house and I don't want it there, I do everything in my power to remove it. What makes you think you have more rights than a chair when you go into someone else's home unannounced?
If I'm sleeping around without a condom, I'm likely to have a child too. When I wear a condom, I prevent the likely child I would have. Condoms are for murderers. I'm good at picking up dates and getting them into the sack, so if I restrain myself from going clubbing then I am prventing a potential child. Non-socialites are murderers.
GTM
What ever happened to the purpose of Christmas anyway, I thought it was about elves smacking each other over the head with a shovel whilst Santa drank whisky and egged them on.
I give you a laser printer and set it to stun
Tsukatu
Deathconsciousness: "Deism is closer to atheism than theism."
Demonz: "Oh? How's that?"
Deathconsciousness: "Well, deism is the belief that there's a-"
Demonz: *grabs airhorn* *FNNNRRRRRRRRTT*
Deathconsciousness: "..."
Demonz: *puts down airhorn* "Sorry, you were saying?"
Deathconsciousness: "...a being that created the uni-"
Demonz: *grabs airhorn* *FNNNRRRRRRRRTT*
Deathconsciousness: "..."
Demonz: *puts down airhorn* "Please continue."
Deathconsciousness: "Are you going to let me finish this time?"
Demonz: "Given that I had to stop you twice just now in the same sentence, I don't think that's likely."
*Tsukatu wanders in*
Tsukatu: "Anyone seen my airhorn?"
Demonz: "Yeah, it's right here. I needed to borrow it for a sec. I knew you wouldn't mind."
Tsukatu: "Oh, yeah, that's fine. I'm just about to head into the Okay With Gays thread."
Demonz: "Here you go." *hands Tsukatu the airhorn*
Tsukatu: "Thanks." *exits the thread*
Demonz: "Where were we?"
Deathconsciousness: "I was saying how atheists also believe th-"
Demonz: "AAAAAUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!"
Deathconsciousness: (startled) "What was that?"
Demonz: "Sorry, I don't have the airhorn anymore. Do go on."
Deathconsciousness: "..."
*an airhorn sounds in a nearby thread*
deathconsciousness
a lack of belief is still a belief that something in itself is lacking. please dont be arrogant.
demonzlunchbreak
What the jesus balls are you talking about?
-
- The Loneliest Number
- Posts: 1
- Joined: 2008.12.17 (06:38)
granted but the rest of the world attacks the british and the spanish leaving u into peices
-
- Maxwell Smart
- Posts: 99
- Joined: 2008.11.09 (18:28)
- NUMA Profile: http://nmaps.net/user/lookatthisisgoodatn
- Location: ...
Um... wish?
You fail to make a wish so everyone dies in a massive supernova that was caused by a temporal paradox in which you go back in time to make one. You both wished and didn't wish, and God is confused so he makes a supernova by accident and kills everyone.
I wish this stupid tickly cough/headache combo would just PISS OFF!!!
!-v(
You fail to make a wish so everyone dies in a massive supernova that was caused by a temporal paradox in which you go back in time to make one. You both wished and didn't wish, and God is confused so he makes a supernova by accident and kills everyone.
I wish this stupid tickly cough/headache combo would just PISS OFF!!!
!-v(
Nobody will probably read this sentance, as it is the second to last one, so put it in your sig if you did. -brainwasher's sig.
"I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it." -Me
-
- Yet Another Harshad
- Posts: 472
- Joined: 2008.09.28 (21:25)
- NUMA Profile: http://nmaps.net/user/isaacx
- MBTI Type: ISFP
- Location: Toronto, Ontario
- Contact:
granted, but you break every bone in your body.
I wish someone would realize it is my birthday
I wish someone would realize it is my birthday
-
- Ice Cold
- Posts: 202
- Joined: 2008.11.13 (01:18)
- NUMA Profile: http://nmaps.net/user/sithmaster
- Location: East Dakota aka the West Coast of Mongolia
- Contact:
granted, but they realize to late, and kill you so no finds out they forgot (if you don't exist, you can't humiliate me ^_^)
I wish it wasn't 2 degrees outside and that next poster puts the temperature somewhere between 70 and 79 degrees (Fahrenheit).
I wish it wasn't 2 degrees outside and that next poster puts the temperature somewhere between 70 and 79 degrees (Fahrenheit).
quotes of the old forum
Blue_Tetris: Wait, wait wait. Does this mean I can break the rules to provoke a reaction and not get banned?
...awesome! The next few days are gonna be some fun.
Someguy: Eagles may soar in the sky, but weasels never get sucked right into a jet engine
Steven Colbert: I see patterns where they don't where they don't exist!!!
Mosh: Fishing for fish only works if the fish are hungry. Don't ask the fish why they don't bite. Rather, consider why they aren't biting.
Or simply chuck a grenade in the lake, pick up the dead fish, and call it a day.
capt_weasle: Mare is actually reagan who is really Tsukatu, who is actually just God. And you can't say he isn't because that would mean he doesnt believe in himself. He just has a low self esteem. Poor guy.
Palemoon:thanks, maestro. Now i can stop smearing paste on my face with a broom
Animator:Eat those poor gingerbread men? For shame. Do you know how many widows are in a gingerbread family? Millions. They have been fighting a war with humanity ever since they were made just to survive and live, with no luck! Think of the children, man! Those poor gingerbread children who are orpahns now, because their moms and dads were eaten, AND THEY WILL SHARE THE SAME FATE TOO! It's saddening. Please, go out there and raise money to save this ever-endangered reality of sugar and bread. Please, for the sake of this kind... think of the oven.
Player 1:You may very well be the first person on the planet to have his faced caved in by a fistful of turkey. Congratulations.
Click here to feed me a Rare Candy!
Get your own at Pokeplushies!
Tsukatu Twilight Rant
BELLA parks her car and enters the school.
EDWARD: "Hello, Bella. I am very awkward, and I am a vampire."
Freeze frame: the text "protagonist, and also a vampire" appears, and an arrow pointing from the text to EDWARD blinks a few times.
BELLA: "I am infatuated with you." (she turns to the camera) "I am unaware that Edward is a vampire."
EDWARD: "I am infatuated with you, too, and I am a vampire."
BELLA: "Let's be awkward together." (she turns to the camera) "I am still unaware that Edward is a vampire."
EDWARD: "I completely agree, and I am very clearly a vampire."
(EDWARD does vampirey things.)
BELLA: "Thank you for saving my life."
EDWARD: "No problem, and I am a vampire."
BELLA: (to the camera) "I am beginning to suspect that Edward is not human."
EDWARD: "I am a vampire."
BELLA: "Are you a superhero?"
EDWARD: "No, I am a vampire."
BELLA: "What are you then?"
EDWARD: "I am not the good guy; I am the bad guy." (he turns to the camera) "That was a lie. I am very much the good guy." (he turns back to Bella) "Specifically, I am a vampire."
BELLA: (to the camera) "I am beginning to suspect that Edward is a vampire."
JACOB: "Hello, Bella, and I am very clearly a werewolf. Look at my wacky canines."
BELLA: "What do you have against Edward, anyway?"
JACOB: "I am a werewolf."
BELLA: "I am convinced that you are a normal human being."
JACOB: "Everyone in my tribe is a werewolf. I am in my tribe; I am also a werewolf. We are all werewolves."
BELLA: "I have no reason to believe that you are more than human."
And what exactly is Bella's problem? Why does she fall head-over-heels with an anti-social, almost preternaturally awkward, whiny, mascara-wearing emo cunt?
lord_day
I guess the guy who wrote XKCD was right. You can't be too stupid for youtube.
brocerius
When i say 'Abortion is murder' i mean just that; it is the taking of life - in that, from conception, a fetus is as definably life as is a bacteria, a puppy, or Stephen Hawking. This is how i think it differs from contraception, masturbation, and not screwing Dave.
Blue_Tetris quotes (all taken from a topic on abortion)
Eating vegetables instead of meat lowers your sperm count, clearly killing potential children. Vegetarians are murderers.
If a chair comes into my house and I don't want it there, I do everything in my power to remove it. What makes you think you have more rights than a chair when you go into someone else's home unannounced?
If I'm sleeping around without a condom, I'm likely to have a child too. When I wear a condom, I prevent the likely child I would have. Condoms are for murderers. I'm good at picking up dates and getting them into the sack, so if I restrain myself from going clubbing then I am prventing a potential child. Non-socialites are murderers.
GTM
What ever happened to the purpose of Christmas anyway, I thought it was about elves smacking each other over the head with a shovel whilst Santa drank whisky and egged them on.
I give you a laser printer and set it to stun
Tsukatu
Deathconsciousness: "Deism is closer to atheism than theism."
Demonz: "Oh? How's that?"
Deathconsciousness: "Well, deism is the belief that there's a-"
Demonz: *grabs airhorn* *FNNNRRRRRRRRTT*
Deathconsciousness: "..."
Demonz: *puts down airhorn* "Sorry, you were saying?"
Deathconsciousness: "...a being that created the uni-"
Demonz: *grabs airhorn* *FNNNRRRRRRRRTT*
Deathconsciousness: "..."
Demonz: *puts down airhorn* "Please continue."
Deathconsciousness: "Are you going to let me finish this time?"
Demonz: "Given that I had to stop you twice just now in the same sentence, I don't think that's likely."
*Tsukatu wanders in*
Tsukatu: "Anyone seen my airhorn?"
Demonz: "Yeah, it's right here. I needed to borrow it for a sec. I knew you wouldn't mind."
Tsukatu: "Oh, yeah, that's fine. I'm just about to head into the Okay With Gays thread."
Demonz: "Here you go." *hands Tsukatu the airhorn*
Tsukatu: "Thanks." *exits the thread*
Demonz: "Where were we?"
Deathconsciousness: "I was saying how atheists also believe th-"
Demonz: "AAAAAUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!"
Deathconsciousness: (startled) "What was that?"
Demonz: "Sorry, I don't have the airhorn anymore. Do go on."
Deathconsciousness: "..."
*an airhorn sounds in a nearby thread*
deathconsciousness
a lack of belief is still a belief that something in itself is lacking. please dont be arrogant.
demonzlunchbreak
What the jesus balls are you talking about?
-
- Antonio Banderas
- Posts: 1703
- Joined: 2008.09.26 (13:56)
- NUMA Profile: http://nmaps.net/user/donfuy
- MBTI Type: ISTP
- Location: port
Granted, but the temperature downs again in a matter of seconds. 1 second.
I want bread.
I want bread.
and
butter.
-
- Ice Cold
- Posts: 202
- Joined: 2008.11.13 (01:18)
- NUMA Profile: http://nmaps.net/user/sithmaster
- Location: East Dakota aka the West Coast of Mongolia
- Contact:
granted, but you drown in a flood of melted butter and toast chunks
I wish KoL didn't have limited action points
I wish KoL didn't have limited action points
quotes of the old forum
Blue_Tetris: Wait, wait wait. Does this mean I can break the rules to provoke a reaction and not get banned?
...awesome! The next few days are gonna be some fun.
Someguy: Eagles may soar in the sky, but weasels never get sucked right into a jet engine
Steven Colbert: I see patterns where they don't where they don't exist!!!
Mosh: Fishing for fish only works if the fish are hungry. Don't ask the fish why they don't bite. Rather, consider why they aren't biting.
Or simply chuck a grenade in the lake, pick up the dead fish, and call it a day.
capt_weasle: Mare is actually reagan who is really Tsukatu, who is actually just God. And you can't say he isn't because that would mean he doesnt believe in himself. He just has a low self esteem. Poor guy.
Palemoon:thanks, maestro. Now i can stop smearing paste on my face with a broom
Animator:Eat those poor gingerbread men? For shame. Do you know how many widows are in a gingerbread family? Millions. They have been fighting a war with humanity ever since they were made just to survive and live, with no luck! Think of the children, man! Those poor gingerbread children who are orpahns now, because their moms and dads were eaten, AND THEY WILL SHARE THE SAME FATE TOO! It's saddening. Please, go out there and raise money to save this ever-endangered reality of sugar and bread. Please, for the sake of this kind... think of the oven.
Player 1:You may very well be the first person on the planet to have his faced caved in by a fistful of turkey. Congratulations.
Click here to feed me a Rare Candy!
Get your own at Pokeplushies!
Tsukatu Twilight Rant
BELLA parks her car and enters the school.
EDWARD: "Hello, Bella. I am very awkward, and I am a vampire."
Freeze frame: the text "protagonist, and also a vampire" appears, and an arrow pointing from the text to EDWARD blinks a few times.
BELLA: "I am infatuated with you." (she turns to the camera) "I am unaware that Edward is a vampire."
EDWARD: "I am infatuated with you, too, and I am a vampire."
BELLA: "Let's be awkward together." (she turns to the camera) "I am still unaware that Edward is a vampire."
EDWARD: "I completely agree, and I am very clearly a vampire."
(EDWARD does vampirey things.)
BELLA: "Thank you for saving my life."
EDWARD: "No problem, and I am a vampire."
BELLA: (to the camera) "I am beginning to suspect that Edward is not human."
EDWARD: "I am a vampire."
BELLA: "Are you a superhero?"
EDWARD: "No, I am a vampire."
BELLA: "What are you then?"
EDWARD: "I am not the good guy; I am the bad guy." (he turns to the camera) "That was a lie. I am very much the good guy." (he turns back to Bella) "Specifically, I am a vampire."
BELLA: (to the camera) "I am beginning to suspect that Edward is a vampire."
JACOB: "Hello, Bella, and I am very clearly a werewolf. Look at my wacky canines."
BELLA: "What do you have against Edward, anyway?"
JACOB: "I am a werewolf."
BELLA: "I am convinced that you are a normal human being."
JACOB: "Everyone in my tribe is a werewolf. I am in my tribe; I am also a werewolf. We are all werewolves."
BELLA: "I have no reason to believe that you are more than human."
And what exactly is Bella's problem? Why does she fall head-over-heels with an anti-social, almost preternaturally awkward, whiny, mascara-wearing emo cunt?
lord_day
I guess the guy who wrote XKCD was right. You can't be too stupid for youtube.
brocerius
When i say 'Abortion is murder' i mean just that; it is the taking of life - in that, from conception, a fetus is as definably life as is a bacteria, a puppy, or Stephen Hawking. This is how i think it differs from contraception, masturbation, and not screwing Dave.
Blue_Tetris quotes (all taken from a topic on abortion)
Eating vegetables instead of meat lowers your sperm count, clearly killing potential children. Vegetarians are murderers.
If a chair comes into my house and I don't want it there, I do everything in my power to remove it. What makes you think you have more rights than a chair when you go into someone else's home unannounced?
If I'm sleeping around without a condom, I'm likely to have a child too. When I wear a condom, I prevent the likely child I would have. Condoms are for murderers. I'm good at picking up dates and getting them into the sack, so if I restrain myself from going clubbing then I am prventing a potential child. Non-socialites are murderers.
GTM
What ever happened to the purpose of Christmas anyway, I thought it was about elves smacking each other over the head with a shovel whilst Santa drank whisky and egged them on.
I give you a laser printer and set it to stun
Tsukatu
Deathconsciousness: "Deism is closer to atheism than theism."
Demonz: "Oh? How's that?"
Deathconsciousness: "Well, deism is the belief that there's a-"
Demonz: *grabs airhorn* *FNNNRRRRRRRRTT*
Deathconsciousness: "..."
Demonz: *puts down airhorn* "Sorry, you were saying?"
Deathconsciousness: "...a being that created the uni-"
Demonz: *grabs airhorn* *FNNNRRRRRRRRTT*
Deathconsciousness: "..."
Demonz: *puts down airhorn* "Please continue."
Deathconsciousness: "Are you going to let me finish this time?"
Demonz: "Given that I had to stop you twice just now in the same sentence, I don't think that's likely."
*Tsukatu wanders in*
Tsukatu: "Anyone seen my airhorn?"
Demonz: "Yeah, it's right here. I needed to borrow it for a sec. I knew you wouldn't mind."
Tsukatu: "Oh, yeah, that's fine. I'm just about to head into the Okay With Gays thread."
Demonz: "Here you go." *hands Tsukatu the airhorn*
Tsukatu: "Thanks." *exits the thread*
Demonz: "Where were we?"
Deathconsciousness: "I was saying how atheists also believe th-"
Demonz: "AAAAAUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!"
Deathconsciousness: (startled) "What was that?"
Demonz: "Sorry, I don't have the airhorn anymore. Do go on."
Deathconsciousness: "..."
*an airhorn sounds in a nearby thread*
deathconsciousness
a lack of belief is still a belief that something in itself is lacking. please dont be arrogant.
demonzlunchbreak
What the jesus balls are you talking about?
-
- It Must've Been Love
- Posts: 333
- Joined: 2008.09.27 (16:09)
- NUMA Profile: http://nmaps.net/user/wumbla
You get amnisia and forget all about KoL
I wish I could spell amsisia right.
I wish I could spell amsisia right.
eganic wrote:I WUMBLA
YOU WUMBLA
HE SHE ME
WUMBLA
-
- Ice Cold
- Posts: 202
- Joined: 2008.11.13 (01:18)
- NUMA Profile: http://nmaps.net/user/sithmaster
- Location: East Dakota aka the West Coast of Mongolia
- Contact:
granted, but you forgot how to a minute later
I wish I remembered KoL and that it had unlimited adventure points
I wish I remembered KoL and that it had unlimited adventure points
quotes of the old forum
Blue_Tetris: Wait, wait wait. Does this mean I can break the rules to provoke a reaction and not get banned?
...awesome! The next few days are gonna be some fun.
Someguy: Eagles may soar in the sky, but weasels never get sucked right into a jet engine
Steven Colbert: I see patterns where they don't where they don't exist!!!
Mosh: Fishing for fish only works if the fish are hungry. Don't ask the fish why they don't bite. Rather, consider why they aren't biting.
Or simply chuck a grenade in the lake, pick up the dead fish, and call it a day.
capt_weasle: Mare is actually reagan who is really Tsukatu, who is actually just God. And you can't say he isn't because that would mean he doesnt believe in himself. He just has a low self esteem. Poor guy.
Palemoon:thanks, maestro. Now i can stop smearing paste on my face with a broom
Animator:Eat those poor gingerbread men? For shame. Do you know how many widows are in a gingerbread family? Millions. They have been fighting a war with humanity ever since they were made just to survive and live, with no luck! Think of the children, man! Those poor gingerbread children who are orpahns now, because their moms and dads were eaten, AND THEY WILL SHARE THE SAME FATE TOO! It's saddening. Please, go out there and raise money to save this ever-endangered reality of sugar and bread. Please, for the sake of this kind... think of the oven.
Player 1:You may very well be the first person on the planet to have his faced caved in by a fistful of turkey. Congratulations.
Click here to feed me a Rare Candy!
Get your own at Pokeplushies!
Tsukatu Twilight Rant
BELLA parks her car and enters the school.
EDWARD: "Hello, Bella. I am very awkward, and I am a vampire."
Freeze frame: the text "protagonist, and also a vampire" appears, and an arrow pointing from the text to EDWARD blinks a few times.
BELLA: "I am infatuated with you." (she turns to the camera) "I am unaware that Edward is a vampire."
EDWARD: "I am infatuated with you, too, and I am a vampire."
BELLA: "Let's be awkward together." (she turns to the camera) "I am still unaware that Edward is a vampire."
EDWARD: "I completely agree, and I am very clearly a vampire."
(EDWARD does vampirey things.)
BELLA: "Thank you for saving my life."
EDWARD: "No problem, and I am a vampire."
BELLA: (to the camera) "I am beginning to suspect that Edward is not human."
EDWARD: "I am a vampire."
BELLA: "Are you a superhero?"
EDWARD: "No, I am a vampire."
BELLA: "What are you then?"
EDWARD: "I am not the good guy; I am the bad guy." (he turns to the camera) "That was a lie. I am very much the good guy." (he turns back to Bella) "Specifically, I am a vampire."
BELLA: (to the camera) "I am beginning to suspect that Edward is a vampire."
JACOB: "Hello, Bella, and I am very clearly a werewolf. Look at my wacky canines."
BELLA: "What do you have against Edward, anyway?"
JACOB: "I am a werewolf."
BELLA: "I am convinced that you are a normal human being."
JACOB: "Everyone in my tribe is a werewolf. I am in my tribe; I am also a werewolf. We are all werewolves."
BELLA: "I have no reason to believe that you are more than human."
And what exactly is Bella's problem? Why does she fall head-over-heels with an anti-social, almost preternaturally awkward, whiny, mascara-wearing emo cunt?
lord_day
I guess the guy who wrote XKCD was right. You can't be too stupid for youtube.
brocerius
When i say 'Abortion is murder' i mean just that; it is the taking of life - in that, from conception, a fetus is as definably life as is a bacteria, a puppy, or Stephen Hawking. This is how i think it differs from contraception, masturbation, and not screwing Dave.
Blue_Tetris quotes (all taken from a topic on abortion)
Eating vegetables instead of meat lowers your sperm count, clearly killing potential children. Vegetarians are murderers.
If a chair comes into my house and I don't want it there, I do everything in my power to remove it. What makes you think you have more rights than a chair when you go into someone else's home unannounced?
If I'm sleeping around without a condom, I'm likely to have a child too. When I wear a condom, I prevent the likely child I would have. Condoms are for murderers. I'm good at picking up dates and getting them into the sack, so if I restrain myself from going clubbing then I am prventing a potential child. Non-socialites are murderers.
GTM
What ever happened to the purpose of Christmas anyway, I thought it was about elves smacking each other over the head with a shovel whilst Santa drank whisky and egged them on.
I give you a laser printer and set it to stun
Tsukatu
Deathconsciousness: "Deism is closer to atheism than theism."
Demonz: "Oh? How's that?"
Deathconsciousness: "Well, deism is the belief that there's a-"
Demonz: *grabs airhorn* *FNNNRRRRRRRRTT*
Deathconsciousness: "..."
Demonz: *puts down airhorn* "Sorry, you were saying?"
Deathconsciousness: "...a being that created the uni-"
Demonz: *grabs airhorn* *FNNNRRRRRRRRTT*
Deathconsciousness: "..."
Demonz: *puts down airhorn* "Please continue."
Deathconsciousness: "Are you going to let me finish this time?"
Demonz: "Given that I had to stop you twice just now in the same sentence, I don't think that's likely."
*Tsukatu wanders in*
Tsukatu: "Anyone seen my airhorn?"
Demonz: "Yeah, it's right here. I needed to borrow it for a sec. I knew you wouldn't mind."
Tsukatu: "Oh, yeah, that's fine. I'm just about to head into the Okay With Gays thread."
Demonz: "Here you go." *hands Tsukatu the airhorn*
Tsukatu: "Thanks." *exits the thread*
Demonz: "Where were we?"
Deathconsciousness: "I was saying how atheists also believe th-"
Demonz: "AAAAAUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!"
Deathconsciousness: (startled) "What was that?"
Demonz: "Sorry, I don't have the airhorn anymore. Do go on."
Deathconsciousness: "..."
*an airhorn sounds in a nearby thread*
deathconsciousness
a lack of belief is still a belief that something in itself is lacking. please dont be arrogant.
demonzlunchbreak
What the jesus balls are you talking about?
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- Odd
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Granted, but then it gets corrupted and you can't do anything with it anymore.
I wish I had that Fur Real Friends Pony toy.
I wish I had that Fur Real Friends Pony toy.
Signatures supplied by the following: NicNac14, Tsukatu, aphex_n, Nphasis, pinkymyno1, UniverseZero, gloomp, sidke, 29403, AMomentLikeThis, Chase, Red Reamer, Izzy, MyCheezKilledYours, Techno, Donfuy juice, southpaw, IAMAMAZING, SkyRay, Skyline, Why_Me, jackass, Leaff, esay, Daikenkai, Kablamo_Boom, wumbla, Izzy, toasters, Octopod Squad, behappyy, notsteve, Shadowraith, GTM, Animator, kkstrong, TearsOfTheSaints, Spawn of Yanni, nnn, Furry Ant, ampburner, fawk. Thanks.
I have 72 signatures.
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- Cowboy Magician
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Granted, but you then get hunted down by activists when they read they label backwards (Toy Pony Friends Real Fur).
I wish I knew what to wish for.
I wish I knew what to wish for.
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- Loquacious
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Granted. Well that was a stupid wish. You wasted your one wish on deciding on something you can no longer have, considering you have no wishes. Catch 22 eh?
I wish I hgad a Canadian accent eh?
I wish I hgad a Canadian accent eh?
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- Cowboy Magician
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Granted, but you'll be back. Just wait until the accent annoys the hell out of you.
I wish for a new guitar.
I wish for a new guitar.
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- Loquacious
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Granted. It is 2 inches tall. Cool eh?
I wish for more wishes.
I wish for more wishes.
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- Cowboy Magician
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No, greedy little...
I wish for an amplifier for the 2 inch guitar.
I wish for an amplifier for the 2 inch guitar.
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- Loquacious
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Granted. Unfortunately, the connecting wire (whatever its called) is bigger than the actual guitar.
I wish I had MSN back ;_;
I wish I had MSN back ;_;
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- Cowboy Magician
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Welcome to Yahoo.
"Wish I was home, for Christmas... (du du duu duu du...)
"Wish I was home, for Christmas... (du du duu duu du...)
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- Spoil-Sport
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granted, but while you were gone, your family turned into a bunch of mutants. you try to save them, but all they're capable of is saying "DOOOOOOM" and killing people.
they kill you dead.
they kill you dead.
and so it goes, and so it goes, and so will you soon i suppose.
- Billy Joel
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- Antonio Banderas
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^^^^Wish something dammit.
I wish a million of handkerchiefs.
I wish a million of handkerchiefs.
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- Spoil-Sport
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..."WOULD ATTACK ME"
Wish granted, but then your intense Donfuyiness kicks in and you wallop their assets.
I wish I had a magical unicorn whos name was chuck who had 13 legs and 10 wings. everyday me and him will fly away to the mystical chocolate river where our thoughts will wander. the next day will start with me waking to find that chuck had disappeared! the evil warlock has stolen chuck from me! my dearest! i have to climb the gates of hell and forge deep into the unknown abandond rat-infested underground city of the warlock-people! once i get to the great castle of CHUCKISINTHISCASTLE i will scale the walls, fight off dragons and make out with fair damsels along the way. There, standing three feet from me, is the Warlock with his crap-stained razor sharp nose, he has apparently pierced many a crap out of noble warriors like myself. I lunge into battle! He hurls his deadly pet rhino at me, which i dodge skillfully. GASP. hes about to use his ultimite wung-show nose technique! now is the time...
PWNGGGG!!11!!!1!!!1!
In a flash of immensity, i yank out my trusty sword Excaldabutt and thrust it into the fiends nose! he lets out a low roar as he slowly sizzles to a crisp. he is dead and i, eganic, am victorious once and for all!...
so yeah thats my wish.
Wish granted, but then your intense Donfuyiness kicks in and you wallop their assets.
I wish I had a magical unicorn whos name was chuck who had 13 legs and 10 wings. everyday me and him will fly away to the mystical chocolate river where our thoughts will wander. the next day will start with me waking to find that chuck had disappeared! the evil warlock has stolen chuck from me! my dearest! i have to climb the gates of hell and forge deep into the unknown abandond rat-infested underground city of the warlock-people! once i get to the great castle of CHUCKISINTHISCASTLE i will scale the walls, fight off dragons and make out with fair damsels along the way. There, standing three feet from me, is the Warlock with his crap-stained razor sharp nose, he has apparently pierced many a crap out of noble warriors like myself. I lunge into battle! He hurls his deadly pet rhino at me, which i dodge skillfully. GASP. hes about to use his ultimite wung-show nose technique! now is the time...
PWNGGGG!!11!!!1!!!1!
In a flash of immensity, i yank out my trusty sword Excaldabutt and thrust it into the fiends nose! he lets out a low roar as he slowly sizzles to a crisp. he is dead and i, eganic, am victorious once and for all!...
so yeah thats my wish.
and so it goes, and so it goes, and so will you soon i suppose.
- Billy Joel
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- Antonio Banderas
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haha, a hell of a story.
Wish granted.
But your excaldabutt appears to have some kind of magic that makes that the user of it has the flu of the losers. Guess what? All your previous victories, vanished.
I wish I was more me than them.
Wish granted.
But your excaldabutt appears to have some kind of magic that makes that the user of it has the flu of the losers. Guess what? All your previous victories, vanished.
I wish I was more me than them.
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