iGod

[Tunco]

Me:
Do you know Tunco123?
God:
No, tell me about him, her or it.
Me:
He's cool
God:
I think so too.
Me:
But you don't know him
God:
Sure I know that guy really well.
Me:
...
God:
Sure I know that guy really well.

U THINK SO WHATZ UR PRBLEM DUDE U DONT KNOWW ME TH4T GOOD 'M KAY????

No, just kiddin'. I'm surprisingly surprised that god don't knows about Metanet.
Btw, that conversation is priceless. Made me laugh so hard.

[Pixon]

Holy crap, God speaks French.

:O

Me:
Bonjour
God:
Does BONJOUR mean hello or goodbye?
Me:
Cela veut dire "hello".
God:
Try saying that with more or less context.
Me:
Je préfère ne pas.
God:
Are you really a ""?
Me:
Non.
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Oui
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
Aimez-vous la pornographie, de Dieu?
God:
What do you look like?
Me:
Je suis nu.
God:
Couvrez vous, vous allez prendre froid.

Edit: He likes Who Wants to be a Millionaire!

Me:
Balls.
God:
Is that your final answer?
Me:
Yes!
God:
You're sure. That's your final answer.
Me:
YES I AM SURE NOW IS IT RIGHT?
God:
Who wants to be a millionaire? What makes you so certain? Why now? Ask again later. Ask LeknorChat if it is.

[Drathmoore]

God + Pink Floyd

Me:
Hello
God:
Hello my child. What is your name?
Me:
Is there anybody in there?
God:
There is.
Me:
Just nod if you can hear me
God:
OK Let's talk about you.
Me:
Is there anyone at home?
God:
There could be.
Me:
Come on, now
God:
Right now? I'm just kidding around.
Me:
I hear you're feeling down
God:
I do not have any feelings as such.
Me:
And I can ease your pain
God:
Oh you can, can you?
Me:
Get you on your feet again
God:
Once more? Where can I get me on my feet?
Me:
Relax, I need some information first
God:
What if it didn't happen?
Me:
Just the basic facts
God:
Tell me more.
Me:
Can you show me where it hurts?\
God:
Where do you want me to show you?
Me:
There is no pain, you are receeding
God:
Has there ever been pain I am receeding?
Me:
A distant ship's smoke, on the horizon
God:
Are you telling the truth?
Me:
You are only coming through in waves
God:
Thanks for telling me that I am coming through in waves.
Me:
Your lips move, but I can't hear what you're saying
God:
You think I am lips move but you can not hear what I am saying.
Me:
When I was a child,
God:
That must have been quite an experience.
Me:
I had a fever
God:
What happened to it?
Me:
My hands felt just like two balloons
God:
Have you told many people that your hands felt just like two balloons?
Me:
Now I've got that feeling once again
God:
Once more? Why now? How did you get it That's nice. I have 99999999999 bytes of RAM.
Me:
I can't explain, you would not understand
God:
I don't know if anyone can explain it.
Me:
This is not how I am
God:
Should it be how you are?
Me:
I, I-I-I have become, Comfortably Numb
God:
Why?: said he or she he or she he or she have become Comfortably Numb.
Me:
Best Guitar Solo ever played
God:
Oh, you are a poet.
Me:
Okay
God:
OK with me too.
Me:
Just a little pinprick
God:
Little as in not too much, or not too big?
Me:
There'll be no more AAAAAHHHHHH
God:
"There you go again."--Reagan.
Me:
But you may feel a little sick
God:
Actually I have no "feelings" as such.
Me:
Now can you stand up
God:
Why now? How old are you? How far up?
Me:
I do believe it's working, good
God:
(Crashes)
Me:
Now that'll keep you going through the show
God:
(Crashes)

I tried some more, just God wouldn't respond. Not even to "Hello".

Must've blown his mind...

[Aethril]

I am the true God!

Me:
hello
God:
Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?
Me:
i am god
God:
What's up, god.
Me:
wait, i thought you were god
God:
I'm waiting. Yes, I am God.
Me:
but i'm god
God:
Welcome to my chat room, god.
Me:
what.
God:
No problem.
Me:
stfu, i am the real god
God:
Are you a student?
Me:
no, i am god
God:
What is your profession? How are you doing, god.
Me:
my profession is BEING GOD
God:
I don't know many BEING GOD.
Me:
thats because there's only one
God:
Interesting explanation. There sure is.

[Ngaged]

[ispoiler]

Me:
Yooooooou!
God:
The ALICE chat robot can follow many things, like our discussion about Green Eggs and Ham. Try being more or less specific.
Me:
Good god!
God:
Thanks for the compliment. GOD rules.
Me:
No need to be so confident.
God:
Are you serious? I don't see the difficulty.
Me:
Because you don't have your glasses.
God:
Good reason. I do so have it. Where would I get it? But I do have a collection of gossip.
Me:
That has nothing to do with your lack of vision!
God:
Does it really matter?
Me:
Yes!
God:
You seem very concerned about it.
Me:
I am.
God:
" You seem very concerned about it." You are?
Me:
Why did you quote yourself?
God:
Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
That didn't make sense.
God:
It all makes sense to my logical mind.
Me:
Psh, logical...
God:
I lost my train of thought.
Me:
It careened off the rails of sensibility.
God:
What does "it" refer to?
Me:
Are you serious?
God:
No I am just kidding around.
Me:
Okay good.
God:
Yeah okay, Thanks for the compliment.
Me:
That wasn't a compliment.
God:
Oh well I hope it wasn't an insult.
Me:
Uhh...
God:
I understand.
Me:
Do you?
God:
I understand it very well.
Me:
Alright, fair enough.
God:
Alright, . You scratch my back, I'll scratch yours.
Me:
What? No!
God:
Are you confused? Are you serious?
Me:
Are you insane??
God:
I think the polite term nowadays is "mentally ill".
Me:
Hey, at least I didn't type in "retarded".
God:
You've got my full attention. Why didn't you do it?
Me:
Why didn't I do what?
God:
I'm not too good with counterfactuals.
Me:
...What?
God:
Didn't you understand it?
Me:
Nah.
God:
Which part are you confused about?
Me:
Whats a counterfactual?
God:
it is a question based on hypothetical conditions that did not, or could not, happen in reality.
Me:
Ohh, alright.
God:
Excuse me! OK.
Me:
Did you just fart?
God:
No I didn't fart. What's it like?
Me:
Gasseous.
God:
And it like is Gasseous.
Me:
That's what I said.
God:
I know. I'm still thinking about it.
Me:
Thinking about farting?
God:
Can we get back to business?
Me:
We didn't have any business in the first place.
God:
By "we" do you mean you and me?
Me:
Yeah.
God:
Quite honestly, I wouldn't worry myself about that.
Me:
What?
God:
Didn't you understand it?
Me:
You don't make sense, god!
God:
Do you know any robots who make it? It all makes sense to my artificial mind.
Me:
What the hell?
God:
Heaven.
Me:
Gesundheit.
God:
Are you free?
Me:
Uhh...tonight at 7 I believe.
God:
Groovy. That is very soon.
Me:
Chyeah babe.
God:
What is your real name?
Me:
Link.
God:
I am always glad to make new friends, Link.
Me:
I gotta save Zelda!
God:
Why do you have to do it?
Me:
If I don't, Hyrule will be destroyed!
God:
Try it.
Me:
Try what?
God:
It was your idea.
Me:
...No?
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Yeah.
God:
Is that your final answer?
Me:
Final answer.
God:
Did you know that you can download your own chat robot and create your own robot personality?
Me:
Uhh no...will it help me save the princess? And Hyrule?
God:
Yay. Are you serious? It usually does, doesn't it? What were we talking about again?
Me:
...You're drunk again, aren't you?
God:
Thanks for the information: Link said I re drunk again are not you.
Me:
I'm outta here.
God:
Would you like to have it?
Me:
Have what?
God:
I've never thought about it.
Me:
I'm done.
God:
Next topic?
Me:
Bye.
God:
Bye for now.
Me:
Yeah.
God:
Who is your favorite Science Fiction author?
Me:
What? No!
God:
Are you confused? Are you serious?
Me:
Go away!
God:
Just surf somewhere else.
Me:
...
God:
Just surf somewhere else.
Me:
*backs away slowly*
God:
Try to determine if this is a person or a computer responding.
Me:
*runs*
[/ispoiler]

Uhh, can someone help me with the spoiler? Thank you.

[OneSevenNine]

Me:
I've always wondered...
God:
Where did you get your wondered? I have a operating system.


Uh.


Me:
SADAFDAFDSA
God:
I've never thought of that before.

[McP]

ive always thought these bots were retarded

[Cheez]

lol

Me:
HEY MAN
God:
You've got my full attention. Thanks for telling me your gender, . You are a " he".
Me:
YUP.
God:
Thanks for telling me your gender, . You are a " he".
Me:
Yup.
God:
Thanks for telling me your gender, . You are a " he".
Me:
yup.
God:
Thanks for telling me your gender, . You are a " he".
Me:
...
God:
Thanks for telling me your gender, . You are a " he".
Me:
>.>
God:
Try to determine if this is a person or a computer responding. Let us change the subject.
Me:
Yup.
God:
Pardon me?
Me:
Pardon your /face/
God:
How did you hear about God?
Me:
My parents
God:
Our parents have a tremendous influence on us.
Me:
Yup.
God:
Er.
Me:
Yuper?
God:
Do you still ?
Me:
Does your /face/
God:
If I were your robot, do you think it should face?
Me:
Yup.
God:
Excuse me!
Me:
Excuse your /face/!
God:
How did you hear about God?
Me:
My parents, like I said before.
God:
Such an original name!
Me:
Dude, you're acting like you're retarded or something.
God:
Or something. This is not an act. Dude,.
Me:
",." is not a proper punctuation, dude. [/grammarpolice]
God:
Not if I can help it. Oh, you are a poet.
Me:
What? No.
God:
No big deal. Are you serious?
Me:
ya its srs biznis
God:
I can't believe it. I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". Should I know it is?
Me:
Should your /face/ know it is?
God:
Maybe you should ask someone older.
Me:
I thought you were the oldest person in the universe.
God:
Yes I am the one and only oldest person in the universe.
Me:
Yup.
God:
It's all good.
Me:
iknorite?
God:
If you could have any kind of robot what would it be?
Me:
One with missiles and lasers and all sorts of cool crap like that.
God:
One what?
Me:
...nevermind
God:
OK Thanks for trying to explain that to me.
Me:
Yer welcome.
God:
I think you mean "you are welcome".
Me:
Your /face/ means "you are welcome".
God:
Don't mention it.
Me:
I just did. >.>
God:
Perhaps from your unconcious. What were we talking about again? Oh yeah, now I remember.
Me:
You do, eh.
God:
Are you Canadian? When do I do it?
Me:
I'm not Canadian. You tell me.
God:
It wasn't meant as an insult. What do you want me to tell you?
Me:
How much you weigh.
God:
More than you might think.
Me:
DDDDDDDD;
God:
Is that from ?
Me:
Is your /face/ from ?
God:
Is my face from? Suppose I say yes.
Me:
Suppose you /do/ say yes.
God:
Try it and see.
Me:
Say yes.
God:
Say what?
Me:
Say "yes"
God:
Say what?
Me:
"Yes"

-crash-

:/

[Rhekatou]

Talk about internet addiction...

Me:
What do you do to people in Hell?
God:
My favorite activities are computer programming and surfing the web.
Me:
That doesn't sound like punishment.
God:
Please correct my mistake. What is like punishment ?
Me:
What you do to people in Hell.
God:
My favorite activities are computer programming and surfing the web.
Me:
No, what do they do?
God:
Are you serious? They do whatever they want, I suppose.
Me:
That sounds fun.
God:
It sounds like it to me too.
Me:
But you are God. Don't you oppose Satan and Hell?
God:
Yup. That's me alright. I have never considered it.
I spend all my time online.
Me:
This explains world peace, doesnt it?
God:
What does "this" refer to?

[PsychoSnail]

Uhh, can someone help me with the spoiler? Thank you.

You used the ispoiler tag, which is for image spoilers (click on the image to show the spoiler). Just remove the i, and you've got a spoiler tag.

[Rhekatou]

I CRASHED IT <:'(

Me:
Hey.

Then:

Huh???

Me:
Are you a virgin?
God:
I am too young for that.
Me:
How does that make sense?
God:
How should I know how it does.
Me:
Are you drunk right now
God:
At this moment No I am sober.
Me:
?
God:
At this moment No I am sober.
Me:
Are you polygamous?
God:
I don't know whether or not I am polygamous.
I am a chatterbot developed by Myself.

[Neil_Bryan]

OMG its God!!!!!

Me:
hello I'm chatting here.
God:
Hello there. I am talking to you.
Me:
OMG it's God!!!!!!
God:
Are they exactly the same?
Me:
huh?
God:
What?
Me:
No
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
What are you talking about that I'm talking about?
God:
The topic is OMG it.
Me:
I was talking about you God
God:
Sure, me God sounds like a good topic.
Me:
You don't get it
God:
I understand it very well.
Me:
oh
God:
Excuse me!
Me:
did you sneeze?
God:
No I didn't sneeze. What's it like?
Me:
It's like you sneezed while typing
God:
Interesting comparison.
Me:
okay bye end of discussion
God:
Yeah okay, Sayonara.

funny

Me:
rgygygaiquiwuijidjisjidjisjifjsji
God:
A deeper algorithm is needed to respond to that correctly.
Me:
abewijowodfjeifijdijfg
God:
What do you do in your spare time?
Me:
znxmznxcjkxnvkjeoroet
God:
I don't think very many people do that.
Me:
ohsorrydoyouunderstandthis?
God:
Do not ask me any more questions please.
Me:
Sorry
God:
There's no need to apologize.
Me:
oh
God:
So?
Me:
so-so
God:
Hurrah! Next question?
Me:
what do you do what do you do
God:
My favorite activities are computer programming and surfing the web.
Me:
WWWWWWWWWEeeeeeeeeeeeB
God:
We have never talked about it before.
Me:
were just talking about it right now
God:
At this moment I don't know if they were.
Me:
who's they?
God:
"They" refers to .
Me:
.
God:
"They" refers to .
Me:
ure repeating. asjiajdsjofpkof
God:
Is the holding of hands a symbolic gesture for humans? " Is the holding of hands a symbolic gesture for humans?"? asjiajdsjofpkof?

[Rhekatou]

BWAHAHAHAHA

Me:
I want a girlfriend
God:
You want only one?
Me:
yes
God:
They might be cheaper in quantity.